30.3.09

High-Top Shoes

Posted in , , by mariagivesyouwiiings | Edit


Am I confused about what makes a guy attractive? Are women supposed to be attracted to gay midgets? Let me explain...



We can all agree the Wentz looks like an utter asshole. Women know this key styling tip - dress to your body (aka wear flattering clothing). Guys need to learn an important thing. High-tops (paired with de-masculating tight pants) make you look TERRIBLE. Wentz looks like Lieutenant Dan (with shoes on his... stumps).

I think high-tops can work for a guy under certain circumstances. Circumstance #1 = they are basketball shoes and he shoots at least 80% from the line (otherwise he's just an obnoxious poser). Circumstance #2 = they are actually Tims and he is a construction worker (in which case style can't exactly put him in the marriage-material-category anyways). Circumstance #3 = he is freakishly tall thus won't undergo the midget-effect (shown above) and they aren't gaudy enough to make him look like he might be a catcher...

It really eats me up inside that all the hipster shits just drive their Hybrid car to Urban Outfitters to purchase these.

What could possibly make them think this is attractive (or heterosexual)?

2 Comments


  1. Margo says:

    I'm thinking guys see Panic at the Disco(no, I will not use the exclamation point) and Fall Out Boy and think, "Hey, they're getting some; I'll try it too!"

    What they fail to realize is that the only reason these idiots get any is because they're rich.

    March 30, 2009 at 11:24 AM

  2. Anonymous

    i like panic at the disco. they don't realy wear high tops...fall out boy does ALL THE TIME though.

    but i agree, these shoes are seriously obnoxious.

    March 30, 2009 at 5:59 PM

Leave a Comment